"So...let's break for lunch...NOW." -- Lindz

"That reminds me. I'm almost out of Viagra." -- ikaros

New catapult fails to launch satellite into space...by a long shot. NASA managers seeking a bigger spring -- Lindz

NASA fanboys reveal their plans to build the world's largest light saber model. -- ikaros

After the failures of the Mars projects, frustrated engineers at Sunnyvale wreck their spacecraft in their own labratory yelling, "Well at least we know what happened to it!!!" -- Lindz

Gee...I was wondering why this kit came with all those "extra bolts!" -- Hydra

"Well, Fred said he dropped a screw inside it, and Phil suggested we shake it around to find it...and...after that it just degenerated into some sort of hysteria and everyone got carried away. We did find the loose screw though..." -- Lindz

"Well, it was the wrong color anyway." -- Lindz

Fed up with delays, this satellite attempts to defect to the European Space Agency. -- ikaros

NASA cancels ACME contract. -- Cashew Lou

"Hmm. I don't think that's quite escape velocity." -- Jinai

"Gesundheit." -- Cashew Lou

"Okay, next time we try this outside instead." -- Jinai

"Yes, but is it art?" -- Petrea

"Your instructions have been carried out, Mr. Rutan" -- Chris

"When it said 'Do Not Touch', I thought it meant the sign!" -- Chris

Jack the Tripper strikes again! -- Chris

*Hiccup!* -- Chris

"Episode One of 'The Chronicles of Joseph Hazelwood, Space Explorer', tonight on the History Channel." -- Chris

"Well, I guess we got a new lawn ornament..." -- Petrea

"Geez, Bob, we can't always out-do the shuttle guys!" -- Petrea

"Someone wanna call Sears and see if this thing is still under warranty?" -- Ivan

"It's a poor man that blames his satellite, Bob." -- Badger

SECTION VII. Failure Analysis (or, Who's the Dumb**** M*****F*****) -- Antaeus Feldspar

"Think of it as really low earth orbit, Ted." -- Badger

"I thought Red Green said duct tape worked on everything!" -- JOLT!!!

"Do we have a little brother we can blame this on?" -- PantherWill

"Cleanup on aisle 8!" -- Amanda Van Rhyn

Everyone knows 'Mousetrap' is impossible to set up correctly, but that doesn't stop them from trying... -- Ben-San Arizona

Despite setbacks, research into large-scale Pop-A-Matic Bubble technology continues unabated. -- Decay

"Well, Bob, I'm not sure how we'll get it into the tree, but Jimmy'll be thrilled at the new fort." -- Amanda Van Rhyn

"Maybe we should have used Legos." -- Spoffy

"Bob, when I said, 3/8" screws, I MEANT 3/8" screws." -- Decay

"Well, we got the ball launcher. Now we just need to build the rest to make the biggest pinball game in the world!" -- Flashman

"Get the Krazy Glue." -- Badger

"I meant MY left, Roger." -- Spoffy

"Why fears about the military-industrial complex are unjustified." -- Decay

The world's first colony drop was sadly underwhelming. -- JustinR

"...can we blame the Soviets for this one?" -- Spoffy

"Next time we do a Colony Drop, lets not use a MODEL." -- Badger

"Oh SURE, NASA can survive on a budget of $6.83, he says..." -- Flashman

Sadly, the six-stage shaken-Coke-can launch propulsion system was not meant to be... -- Ben-San Arizona

NASA's Mardi Gras float. -- Decay

"The idea on where to place blame in the press is ingenious, gentlemen, but I just don't think SoBig has the kind of lifting power to do this." -- Antaeus Feldspar

"Let's blame it on terrorism, THEN we'll get some funding." -- Badger

"On the plus side, it'll make a killer punch bowl." -- Ben-San Arizona

"1965: Smokeless ashtray technology has yet to reach consumer level." -- Decay

"So... our plan to put men on Mars... 2017, we said." "Let's set it back to... 2033." "Yeah... definitely... yeah." -- JustinR

"Gentlemen, we can rebuild him... make him stronger... faster... bulkier... top-heavier..." -- Antaeus Feldspar

"You know, I never did like the new Erector sets." -- Spoffy

"There's only one person who could have done this. Those rowdy members of Animal House!" -- Decay

"I don't wanna wake him, R2D2 is a mean drunk." -- Badger

Young Timelords discover Dalek-tipping -- Ben-San Arizona

"I'm still very positive about the mission, Dave. Even though I've fallen and I can't get up." -- Antaeus Feldspar

"The new electronic condem is a total failure." -- Atom

"New rule. No smoking after the company burrito feed." -- Cashew Lou

"I told you it was pronounced 'Gojira'." -- Cashew Lou

"This is why I hate Bring Your Kid To Work Day." -- Cashew Lou

"Are you happy now, Mister 'Here Comes the Boss, Look Busy'?" -- Cashew Lou

"*sigh*...put it on eBay." -- Lindz

"I know...let's blame Mikey!" -- Rabbi Tom

"So...what do we do now?" "Right now, I'm busy holding onto my ass after crapping my pants, okay?" -- Lindz

At this time, Robert realized buying the jackstand from Pep Boys was a bad idea. -- Rabbi Tom

"I told you not to let the ravers have a party here last night!" -- Rabbi Tom

"ALLL-VINNNN!!" -- Cashew Lou

Tech on right: "I peed!" Tech on left: "I pooped!" -- Lindz

"I don't care how low we set the hoop, we'll never build a basketball-playing robot!" -- ikaros

"Well, shoot. EST didn't prepare me for this!" -- Lindz

"Well, there she GOES!" -- Lindz

Tech on right: "Well, it just GOES to show you!" Tech on left: "Yeah, and now I GOES to the bathroom!" -- Lindz

"Instructions? I never read the instructions." -- Drake

"Well, the 'cause massive damage due to concrete floor impact' test seems to be a success." -- Drake

Even the machinery wanted to march into the boss' office and tear him limb from limb. -- PantherWill

"It's supposed to go horizontally, really!" -- Cirrus

"Let's see...rubber band, check. Giant slingshot, check..." -- Cashew Lou

"Thank God it didn't fall on anyone, Fred. Fred? FRED...?" -- Cirrus and ikaros

"Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?" "I think so, Brain, but..." -- Surak